Hello. My name is Ryan, and I cry when people get the Golden Buzzer on America’s Got Talent.
It all started when they put the Golden Buzzer on America’s Got Talent. I really can’t explain it other than to say Jason Raff and Simon Cowell are geniuses. I am no Simon fan either. He kicked Howard Stern of the judges panel which not only took one of the world’s most entertaining humans out of prime time television, but also rendered the AMERICA’S Got Talent judge’s panel completely without an American.
But I digress, back to my Golden Buzzer issue. Its silly. I know they’re coming, they’re almost always the last act of the episode, and sometimes they even tease the buzzer winner in the promos. I calmly watch the emotional story of the performer (almost all performers have emotional stories). The buzzer winner stories are especially emotional usually.
This cat had a brain injury that gave him a debilitating stutter, now he’s a legit funny stand-up comedian.
So the emotional story happens, I’m not crying. The performance starts, I know its buzzer-worthy, and its good, no tears. Crowd goes nuts, judges are standing, I am as cool as a cucumber. Then one of those British, Canadian, or super-hot German judges hits that stupid little buzzer. The emotional music starts. Slow-motion jumping and crying ensues. Usually some physically or mentally disabled or dying family members make their way to the stage with the buzzer pushing judge who is hugging everything with a heart beat. Its all too much for me.
The best part of the whole sordid saga is I really only watch the show because my kids love it. I promise I wouldn’t choose to emotionally invest in a deaf contortionist or whatever they bring on stage. I think they love the acts, but they adore the moment the buzzer is hit and they can instantly look over at their old man and see him wiping tears like the mom of a super nerdy kid on his wedding day (she’s emotional because she didn’t think any girl would ever like her super-nerdy son).
They get a good laugh at me once a week. I’m going to assume that’s a good thing for some parenting reason I haven’t read yet.
Grab a Kleenex.